Sam is the typical fanboy--the type that worships Nintendo more than any sane man should. He's Jewish, which is the first thing that's wrong with him. He's also a whiney son of a bitch. Definitely the kind of gamer that would declare a game he loses at "unfair", complete with a face covered in tears and at least one broken TV screen.

Alex is the raw brains of the operation. Sadly his "beautiful mind" is a little warped, bent every so often on killing small animals or stealing food from the homeless. Hey, he can't help it--the video games really do rot your brain, y'know! Also has a tendency to confuse fiction for reality, often with startling consequences.

Nick is the last with a witty retort. Possibly smarter than Alex and more cynical than Sam, but keeps it hidden under a trendy "rock emo" persona. Proves his gaming manhood by beating games quick and dirty. Would not eat his own clothing for a new Zelda game, but has come very, very close.

Gus is the tough gamer with a "fuck you" attitude. Under the punk facade lies a boy who spends his entire day in his basement lair either watching the Labyrinth or doing voice-overs for classic Final Fantasies. Absurd? Pathetic? Maybe. Just don't say anything about it and you'll escape with your life.